Catpaw – diary of an angry cat

I can’t believe it! Tottenham is no longer bottom of the heap in the Premiership League. For those of you that don’t follow British soccer (football to the world) Tottenham hasn’t just been bad, they have been monumentally bad. Look in the dictionary for the following words atrocious, awful, pathetic, heart rending, abysmal, barrel scrapping and embarrassing and you’ll be redirected to Tottenham Hotspurs.

Oh man, how bad have they been? Well, let’s just say I gave up wearing my Tottenham scarf because I was too embarrassed to be seen in it. I was laughed at by a TTC conductor who is an Arsenal fan. I was laughed at by a Sunderland fan in a store for god’s sake! How humiliating was that… laughed at by a SUNDERLAND FAN of all people.

AH! But they are no longer bottom of the barrel. They are just a teeny, tiny centimetre above the bottom. They’ve begun to figure out how to put the ball in the opposing teams goal. Holy Sh*t I didn’t think they knew how to. West Brom is now the bottom feeders, phew.

If they start playing like they did at the beginning of the season, I just may have to go over there and kick some butts!

I just might be able to start wearing my beloved Tottenham scarf again.

I admit it.  I can’t leave Palin alone. As long as there is a sliver of hope that this bully will gain the office of President, I won’t be happy. Here’s her latest quote:

I’m like, okay, God, if there is an open door for me somewhere, this is what I always pray, I’m like, don’t let me miss the open door

Can’t you just hear her talking to foreign leaders? What a blast that would be! Here’s what I think a meeting with a Canadian official would be like:

Yea like, you (whispers to an aide: where did you say this guy was from? Canada?)

Like you Canadas (what? Canadians? That a word?)

You Canadians (whispers again: You sure that’s a country? Where are they from again?)

You Canadians have oil and water and stuff we need. Like it’s, like God’s will we have it, so don’t be stinkers and just, like hand it over.

OMG! She’s an Alaskan Valley Girl! I haven’t heard so many like’s come out of one mouth since eavesdropping on a couple of teenage girls talking about how much they disliked their teachers. While I’m waiting for subways and streetcars, I idly make up conversations between Palin and various government leaders. It’s a fun game. Well, it’s all fun and games until I invent a conversation between Iranian crackpots and Palin. It’s usually about this time I scare the sh*t out of myself and decide this isn’t funny afterall. I’d offer to buy her a thesaurus so she can gain a vocabulary, but I really don’t want to encourage her.

OMG, like I am joining the local chapter of PAA – Palin Addicts Anonymous.

Do you hear that?
No, that whump.
It’s coming from all over the world.

That is the sound of millions of bigots spinning in their graves. Great sound isn’t it? Despite running a campaign of division and hatred, the Republicans lost. Well, actually they had their butts kicked by a class act.

Obama didn’t run play in the gutter with the Republicans. He distanced himself from the morally bankrupt style of government that is so prevalent in the US and offered something the American people haven’t had in a long, long time: hope and optimism. I think Americans are fatigued and just want their lives back. They are tired of living under a shadow of terror and a government unwilling or incapable of standing before them and saying “we will not live cowering in fear at every shadow that crosses before us”.

Optimism – wonderful creation. Let’s hope the new Camelot can live up to expectations.
But back on the Palin front – oh you just knew I couldn’t leave this topic alone! Dear Gov Palin is upset at her Critic:

…cruel and it’s mean-spirited, it’s immature, it’s unprofessional, and those guys are jerks.

Kind of hurts when you’re the target of a witch hunt, doesn’t it Governor. Now that the campaign has been relegated to the history books, the Repulican infighting has become very public. The McCain camp is furious with her behaviour and ill preparedness for the job and she in turn is … well …. name calling. Does this surprise anyone? If it does, then you must have slept through the last 2 months.

The McCain camp picked this person! Did no one think of checking her credentials? Did no one bother asking, “By the way Governor, you do realise there is a world beyond the Alaskan borders”?

But I find it quite telling that Palin is upset by personal attacks on her. Gee! They hurt don’t they! Guess because they are aimed at her now, this is unacceptable, but it was okay to indulge in a vicious smear campaign that whipped up violent fear in the masses. S’alright it was all for a greater good wasn’t it? All to get you one step closer to the top job.

Governor Palin displayed a recklessness that was stunning. Her demagoguery was terrifying. She thought nothing of exploiting the extreme fears of a weary people. She never hesitated to twist facts and spin half-truths and mistruths. She appeared to have no clue what her job would entail. Her lack of lack of knowledge on a wide range of issues was breathtaking. As someone who lives next door to the US, I for one am glad to see the back of her.

PS. Stinkers? Seriously, you called someone a stinker? Oh heavens, we’ve just leapt back into grade school! Stinkers? Thank you Governor Palin for one last giggle before you go.