Someone wrote in and made a great suggestion. Vespa Virgins for the new Church of the Holy Vespa! We could have Vespers for the Vespa Virgins to attend. Oh this could get totally out of control. Wonder how much I could sell spots in the Vespa Virgins for? I could get the donators photo, airbrush robes on them and put them on a Vespa scooter.
Anyone know how many Vestal Virgins there were? (I so wish I had thought of Vespa Virgins!)
I stumbled across this tortured answer to a question about what the duties of a Medieval Nun were. Of course I had to share it with you. My agony is your agony. I added the paragraph breaks so it would be a bit easier to read. Everything else is exactly as the writer typed it:
As Monarchy was the dominant form of government in thos Feudal days, it is only right and proper that among other roles, Nuns functioned as both spiritual advisors and ladies -In Waiting to Queens and Princesses, among other noblewomen.
as recently as l926 In Italy and l952 in Portugal , Nuns, probably nurses, performed mortuary functions for Queen Margherita of Italy (In l926) and Former Queen Amelia of Portugal in l952.l
The Portugese ex-Queen died in Versailles, so missionary hoisital nuns had to be seconded from a Paris-area Convent. so they funcitoned inthe usual Nun roles as teachers and also nurses ( or equivalent) Undertakers for the females of the nobililty,and the usual churchly functions such as sacristan (supervisor of church housekeeping an specificaly that of religious articles)
This evolved into the interesting (Logistics Apostolate) of the St. Zita Convent in New York, responsible for Religious artifcles logistics of ocean-going ships. ( a big pipeline for ship re-supply ran under l4Th street, near their convent- a big coincidence. ) No, the Nuns did not run the Tanker-supply pumps, but did distribute religious articles to ships. COn Ed runs the pipeline.
Don’t you just love the right turn from Feudal days to nuns don’t run tanker supply pumps. No clue why the writer felt obliged to add the bit about Con-Ed but it adds a certain … oh .. I don’t know… stream of consciousness feeling to the answer. I just hope some poor kid didn’t trot back to school with this clipped into their essay.
I now have this lovely image of nuns in penguin suits, leaning up against a tanker truck chewing gum and pumping gas. Wow, that’s an image that will burn your retinas out!
I know.. I know.. this will be the last for awhile. I promise. But Wiki can be such fertile grounds. A good question passed by my screen. What caused the Iran Hostage Crisis? Very good question. Want to read the answer? Are you sure? Here it is – exactly as it was written:
the ruler of iran told his people that america was satin and evil. when he got cancer he requested to be treated by american doctors. this made the ppl of iran mad and they revolted agenst there ruler taking 66 US citizens
Ohhhhh… so close! More proof spell check is the handiwork of Satan.
Sniff, sniff .. smell that? That is the fine scent of silliness lurking in the air. Yes, I’ve been lurking over at Wikianswers again and found this fine crop of nonsense to share with you. The questions are genuine questions found there, the answers are ones I would dearly love to leave. I feel so pedantic when I wander through Wikianswers.
How many centuries are in 5 decades?
I sincerely hope this person simply transposed the question.
What kind of person is Eleanor Aquitaine?
Um .. a kind of dead person? Tenses children, tenses.
Why does judge taylor not hold mayella in concept of court
(from to kill a mockingbird)
Hell of a court the Judge is holding!
How many times was the body aberham lincoln moved before it was permitly buried in the new tomb in illiois.?
i know it was built in 1901 but it is still relitvily new also i just want a number of times like 2 or 5 you know
Poor old aberham, do you think he ever finds a home?
What will happen if you computer abuse someone
My mind keeps drifting back to this question. How do you computer abuse someone? Do you smack them around with a mouse pad? Deafen them with sound card? Whip them with the power cord? The mind boggles.
Why was Adam the fastest runner?
Now, my Bible knowledge is a wee bit rusty, but I don’t remember any verse saying “And verily, Adam shall be the fastest and fleetest of foot”.
If your trying to eat fatty foods to get a bigger butt how do you lose weight?
Further proof fatty foods and common sense are mutually exclusive
How old was he when he became the king of morocco?
You have no idea how many people assume you know what they are talking about. I think people believe we can read their minds by touching the keyboard… King of Morocco – which King? Oh… I see.. you want to know about the 2nd King.
How many square feet of carpet shampoo can you clean in one hour?
This one is just fun to think about. I have this wonderful image of a man in a room with a tiny brush desperately trying to scrub the shampoo bubbles clean.
How many days and hours do you have to practice?
Another Telepathic Keyboard question.
What do you need for collage?
(Found in the entrance requirements/schools category)
Depends, do you want to make a nice photo display of your friends and family? Then glue, photos, a surface to put them on.
Or, do you want to prepare for college? In that case, the ability to spell college is a good starting point.
What is the difference between a Roman Catholic and a Christian?
Don’t you just love this question? I don’t know if it was written out of arrogance or ignorance.
How do lemurs communicate?
Entirely depends upon what phone plan they have signed up for. (and yes I know this is a good question. Occasionally a question just screams out a smart ass response)
Can you fly using an id card?
Two answers come screaming to mind:
No, id cards are too small to substitute for magic carpets. Best to stick with the tried and true method of flying.
No, keep your id well hidden, you really don’t want the government poking around in it.
Does drugs cause a heart
attack?
Dunno about the heart attack part, but it sure seems to play havoc with your spelling.
What is email good for?
Spam, spam and more spam.
What did Pythagoras do in the field of Mathematics?
Make life a living hell for generations of children.
I was cruising around the TTC (Toronto Transit Commission) web site and spotted this little gem. You can sign up to get your monthly transit pass via snail mail. Fill out a nifty little form and supply a voided cheque and voila, no line ups to get your pass. It simply shows up in your mailbox in a timely fashion. Cool, eh?
Now… there’s one little problem with the form you fill out on line. Take a look:
In order to get your advanced TTC pass, they require your driver’s license. I don’t have a problem with requiring some sort of ID for security, but … seriously, a driver’s license? I know quite a few TTC users that don’t have a driver’s license, it really isn’t a necessity in Toronto. So they can’t fill out the form – they get rejected.
Yes, yes, I know, you can still buy your pass at the kiosks or booths. But there is a certain irony in an organisation that is promoting mass transit, requiring users to show a driver’s license to get a mass transit pass via mail.
You think the TTC could come up with a few choices for proof of ID. A little bit of imagination is called for.
Sarah Palin has left politics and become a journalist. I know, I know… I’m laughing so hard I hurt. Sarah Palin the journalist really doesn’t trip off the tongue does it. Something like Fox News. Oh wait… it gets better… she’s working for that paragon of balanced reporting Fox News. Priceless, isn’t it. She wrote (or someone who knows how to string together sentences longer than “See Dick. See Jane” wrote for her) the following press release:
“I am thrilled to be joining the great talent and management team at Fox News,” … “It’s wonderful to be part of a place that so values fair and balanced news.”
Fox values fair and balanced news? Isn’t this the network that pays Bill O’Reilly to spew his hate filled rants all over the airwaves? Great now we can have stereo stupidity!
Oh well, someone had to hire the woman.
